What Drives Us to Give?

Between September 24 and 29, and then just two weeks later, we were all stunned at the horrific, widespread, and devastating impact of Hurricane Helene and Hurricane Milton as these relentless storms tore across the southeastern U.S. and across all of central Florida.  

Within a matter of hours of relentless winds and torrential downpours, hundreds of thousands of people’s lives were dramatically changed forever.  The death count is still rising.  Tens of thousands of homes with no flood insurance were completely destroyed, and Tons of precious inventory of daily necessities were washed away.  Water supplies were destroyed. Many hundreds of miles of roads, bridges, and infrastructure disappeared. 

Within hours, volunteers from across the U.S. were responding. Thousands of people dropped everything and headed to help someone else in need. Hundreds of trusted non-profits and faith communities are still deploying tons of resources and expertise to help those who now have nothing left. Millions of us who feel helpless are sending funding to help those providing help.  We are wired to want to do something to help the suffering. 

But did you know that during this same week as Hurricane Helene, a major devastating typhoon hit the Philippines with about the same force as Hurricane Helene? Have you heard of the devastation the island of Luzon has experienced?  Unless you have ties to the Philippines, you likely have not.   Yet, the damage is equally devastating.  Yet our response is very different—the suffering there is far removed from our thinking–after all,  that need is halfway around the world.

Ponder these soul-searching questions:

1. Do you give because you want to partner with a worthy cause?

Let’s face it: We gain satisfaction from feeling a part of a worthy endeavor. Two or more people working in harmony can indeed accomplish more than one person working alone. When asked to help meet a need that means a lot to us, we are likely to respond.  

Suffering rallies us to act.

Many years ago, LIFE magazine released a photo story about a Midwestern farmer and his family who lived next to a massive wheat field.  

The first photo showed the farmer and his wife panic-stricken as they realized their young son was missing—nowhere to be found near the security and safety of the farmhouse.

The second photo indicated that the news of the missing boy had spread to the community. Neighbors had come to help search for the boy. The photo showed the people’s confusion and distress as they wandered with no direction, seeking to find the lost boy.

The third photo showed that, after hours of fruitless searching, someone had taken leadership.  The small rural community had been organized into a human chain, each person locking hands with another and together sweeping up and down the rows of tall, ripe wheat.  Each person assumed responsibility for the specific area immediately in front and to each side of him or her.  They now had a plan as they searched for the boy.

The last photo expressed heartbreak and sorrow.  The father was pictured kneeling over the body of his son as those in the search party looked on in sad disbelief. 

Yes, they found the boy, but their effort in partnership occurred too late. He had died from exposure. 

The only words in this photo feature were those of the grieving father as he looked up at the others:  “I only wish we had joined hands sooner.”

Partnership is joining together, locking hands in total cooperation, and moving with singleness of purpose to meet an objective.

In the recent hurricane crisis that devastated north Georgia and western North Carolina, many thousands rallied to do whatever they could.  Millions gave money. Many thousands volunteered to do whatever they could do.  It will take years to recover, but we all got involved because we wanted to do what we could do in the best way we could.

2. Do you give to meet a need?

Seldom, if ever, does our human nature stimulate us to act without knowing of a need.

Many years ago, I agreed to serve as chairman for a building addition for my local church.  Over a period of about two years, and in the midst of a recession, the moderately sized congregation gave over $150,000.  We built only as we had the available cash. When the building was completed and dedicated, the money stopped coming.  Why?  In the minds of those who had given, the need had been met.

3. Do you give to represent your commitment to a cause when you otherwise could not participate?

When I joined the staff of Campus Crusade for Christ in 1966, a wonderful, very intelligent, and well-educated elderly lady made a commitment to be a part of my support team through a monthly contribution of $15. Today, $15 would not likely pay for lunch, but back then, this contribution could have been equal to her food budget for a week. 

She then told me why she had decided to give:  “Larry,” she said, “you are doing something that I cannot do. You will be talking to young people of a generation different from mine.  I would be frightened to be on that campus today.  I would not know what to do or what to say, and I don’t have the physical energy I had when I was in college.  You are doing something I cannot do, so I want to help you in the only way I can—through my prayers and my limited finances.”

Let me tell you, those were sobering words to hear. She trusted me to do what she was unable to. Every month for the following 18 years, she sent in her gift—216 months of vicarious participation, totaling $3,240.  She wanted to help meet a need.

4. Do you give to satisfy your own self-worth?

Have you found yourself feeling “good” inside because you gave something you had—your time, your skills, your money, or personal possessions—to help meet a need?  The vast majority of volunteers talk about how fulfilled they feel when they are giving.

It is sad to say that many thousands of people give only with the motivation of maintaining a positive self-image.  Many give because they feel it just would “look bad” if they didn’t want to help.

One man confided in me some years ago, “I give to my favorite charities and donate time to worthy community projects so that I have something to discuss.  I would love to be free from the obligation to help, but I guess if I didn’t give something, I would have trouble living with myself.”  

5. Do you give as an expression of gratitude?

The one who gives with the sole motivation of expressing gratitude is rare today.  This person basically is saying, “I’m just thankful that I can help.  I have been given so much; this is the least I can do.”

My dad was a pastor of a little country church that sent its members door to door in the community to raise the needed funding to build the church building—the same church that a year later received the Heart of America Bell because of generous giving from people throughout the U.S. and around the world. 

I remember one old gentleman in his late 80s who attended that little church.  Mr. West was a regular.  Every Sunday, he drove to church in an old light green Model A Ford that he kept in tip-top shape and so clean you could eat your dinner off the hood.

Mr. West’s health was good, but his wife was sick most of the time.  His daughter, Ruth, was badly crippled from polio. Even though he and his family did not have much of the world’s wealth, Mr. West was in love with Jesus and life itself.  I still hear him say, “I can’t give my God enough; He’s been so good to me.  He loves me so.”  

How many people do you personally know that give whatever they have just because of gratitude?

6. Do you give because of the blessing you will receive?

I wish more people realized that blessings return to the giver when something is given away.  As a result of giving, God is able to give to the giver much more–a multiplied return on that which was given. 

“I can’t afford not to give, Larry,” one friend said with a sparkle in her eyes.  “God can bless me only if I’m giving away what He’s given to me.  I don’t want to turn God’s blessings off, so I’m going to be what He wants me to be—a pipeline that carries His love to others!”

7. Do you give to be remembered?

Once, while visiting Washington, D.C., I spent an afternoon at the National Cathedral.  While admiring the Cathedral and learning of its history, I noticed that almost everything in the Cathedral was memorialized in memory of a loved one.

You may have no interest in being memorialized with a monogrammed, quilted kneeling cushion placed in the National Cathedral.  But maybe you would like that friend to remember your good cooking as he or she cut a slice of your freshly baked bread or piping hot pie.  Otherwise, you simply would have left it on his or her doorstep with an anonymous note that read, “I’m thankful for you.”

8. Do you give to achieve security?

A few years ago, the families of our block began a Neighborhood Watch program.  We committed ourselves as a group to watch out for one another’s property and to be alert to any activity that might be harmful to any of us.  Although we weren’t giving money to one another, we were committed to giving an eye or ear to what was going on around us.  Why?  Our security was at stake.  As neighbors, we believed that if we gave to one another, we could have a safer place to live.

In recent years I’ve met numerous men of great wealth who have chosen to give substantial sums toevangelism and discipleship.  One man commented to me, “Larry, this is the only place I see to give my money.  If I don’t do all I can to change people’s hearts through Jesus Christ, our world has no hope.  I want a safe place where my grandchildren can grow to be adults.  I believe that unless society is changed from the inside out, there will be no security for the next generation.” Giving for causes like evangelism and discipleship was his means of a secure future!  Think about it!

9. Do you give for tax advantages?

For over 12 years, I led various significant funding thrusts on behalf of Campus Crusade for Christ. I noticed at one particular time of the year (December 15-31), strange things happened.  Contributions of the strangest amounts were received—checks like the one for $5,242.50.  

On one occasion. I had one of my staff fly three hours to formally accept a very large gift on December 31—it had to be in the hands of an official ministry representative that day.  A day later, and the gift would have been considered given in the following tax year.  Why?  The end of the tax year was fast approaching, and the contributors had learned from their tax specialist that to be in a lower tax bracket, they needed to give just that much more before a deadline. 

I love to give to causes that are dear to me. My giving is my way of partnering with read change agents!  Each year, I give significantly more than the IRS believes I should be giving. When I file my taxes each year, I get a warning that I am giving too much—I am flagged for being too generous.  This could result in an IRS audit.  I will risk it.

Of the nine reasons listed, which three most match your motivation for giving? 

Larry O’Nan

Larry O’Nan is the author of Intentional Living and Giving and a seasoned consultant with over 40 years of experience. He helps individuals and organizations align their resources with God’s purpose, inspiring intentional living and generous stewardship rooted in biblical principles.